While chatting with some young people recently, one referred to the 90’s as the late 1900’s. While Maddie was technically correct, I couldn’t help but laugh. It makes my college years seem like the dark ages!
Not only did I find it amusing, I also found her comment insightful. Maddie’s perspective is different from my own, given the varying time/experiences we’ve each had on this planet.
For example, when I was in my mid-twenties, we were encouraged to bring our ‘best selves’ to work – showing up as a strong team player who can collaborate and/or conform. This was a common practice at the time, and many Boomers or Gen Xers adopted this work hard-play hard mentality which largely kept employees 'in their lane’ at work. Unfortunately, for some people it also meant fitting in by way of hiding or pretending to be someone who you’re not.
Best Self at Work
My Uncle Jimmy was a banker. For most of my life I only saw him at holidays or family gatherings, and on those occasions, he was usually relaxed, laughing with his husband, wearing a 80’s band t-shirt with more than a 5 o’clock shadow. One day I was running errands with my dad, and we stopped at the bank.
There was my uncle, in a suit, clean shaven, with a plastered smile on his face. That didn’t look like Uncle Jimmy to me!
At work Uncle Jimmy became ‘James the Branch Manager’…and I’m pretty sure that Jimmy and James have never met. That’s the image that sticks with me when I think of people who take on two personas – for inside and outside of work.
Don’t get me wrong - I wouldn’t expect Uncle Jimmy to show up to work inappropriately dressed for the job, but I would hope to see his wedding picture proudly displayed on his desk (spoiler alert: it’s not).
Whole Self at Work
In today’s work environment, we are encouraged to bring our ‘whole selves’ to work. We value the diversity it brings to the organization.
Maddie at age 25 shows up to work as her authentic self and expects to be accepted that way. She’s not aware there were lanes to stay in at some point, and instead charts her own path and does so honestly and fully. Providing an environment of belonging where she doesn’t feel she has to hide any aspect of who she is as a person is today’s standard.
That ‘best self’ I had reserved for work back in the late 1900’s has now morphed into the ‘whole self’ I bring to work today. And it feels soooo much better to be me – and to be accepted as such.